How honest do you really expect people to be?
As adults, if you have grown up in Australia, it is reasonable to assume that you will have had at least some level of education or information made available to you regarding STIs and how they are transmitted.
Even if you didn't grow up here, we have campaigns on the backs of toilet doors, accompanying con dom advertisements, and television- the media for the masses- with such famous campaigns as the Grim Reaper for HIV.
On a side note-
a more recent TV ad with underpants on a washing line telling us that 1 in 8 people has herpes.
Someone in the office once commented on that ad, saying "yuck- I just wish they wouldn't play that when I'm watching TV, especially around dinner time ". Despite that individual's disgust, conversation ensued around the message of the ad, with people tlkaing about the 1 in 8 statistic. It can't be true- surely it's not. Why not I asked? It's a normal thing, and can happen to anyone. Oh sure but... [insert dismissive mumblings] was the general reply. Why not- I pressed, in fact on this floor in the office we have about 50 people? So statistically 5 or 6 people are living with it in this room alone.
Oh you cannot imagine the awkward silence that fell over everyone. Smiles and giggles gone, replaced by horrified blank faces, an almost universal avoidance of eye contact, followed by chairs rotating back to workstations as the distasteful thought settled in to their NIMBY-ist minds.
Had I really pushed them that far? The lack of willingness to accept a simple epidemiological reality was that troubling, in a room of people with an average of a Masters degree each, working in a health focused government agency?!
To return to the original complainant, who felt the ad made them uncomfortable. You don't want to have to think about it? Hmm... Don't you think that could perhaps be the POINT of the campaign? (Ok admittedly the campaign is froma private company trying to sell a product to treat it, but part of the point...) We try to avoid reality. Things always happen to other people, not me or my friends.
So it's a reasonable assumption that people know these things are out there. What's not always known is:
i) if people know or acknowledge they have the infection. "err... it must be a sore from my underwear rubbing"
ii) if they will tell you they have it. "no of course I've never had an STI... no I've never had a test, but I would know...", "do you have condom?" "me either".... "oh well"
Most people's reactions to contracting something are:
a) embarrassment at having to seek treatment
b) feeling upset/ hurt that someone didn't tell them
What most will tend to overlook is their own personal responsibility in the situation. Why didn't you take the necessary steps to avoid the situation? You knew STIs existed, yet you chose not to use a condom.
Assuming someone will tell you is a nice idea, that the world operates in an open and honest way, but fairly naive, and possibly unreasonable too. If you know, with all the information available to you that there is a chance it will happen you should be reasonably expected to take some responsibility for the situation. This has also been tested legally, although the rulings are not always consistent- there have been cases where people have tried to sue the person who infected them with HIV, and lost- as they didn't take reasonable precautions to protect themselves. Interestingly this upsets a lot of people - with statements like "they should HAVE TO TELL a partner"!! ( Obviously HIV is an extreme example, but you get similar reactions to something very common and easily treates, like eg Chalmydia. )
Apply the same logic to another situation: roads and traffic. People know there are cars. People know that being hit by a car will hurt. People know there are reasonable precautions they can take, like crossing at a pedestrian crossing, or even looking before they cross the road. If you then walk out into traffic, ignoring this knowledge, and have your leg broken by the vehicle that hits you, you are the one who was at fault- not the driver of the vehicle.
I'm not saying anyone should be ashamed if they happen to contract an STI, but you should take responsibility for your own actions and your health- no one else will!
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