Douchebags online- aka A new hobby for Luke?

I have previously confessed to trying the internet dating world. I think it's a very interesting showcase of personalities.

Take the following for example: This person had requested contact with me about 4 times, and the first three, given his profile, I had rejected. I was applying logic- we don't sound like we have a lot in common, and Rule #5- he had posted a photo of himself topless. (See Rules for internet dating. Sadly I have tried to share the hilarity of his pic with you, but can't figure out how to copy it).

The fourth time he requested contact I thought- what the hell, maybe he's taking the piss out of himself with the picture, and if he's that keen I'll see what he has to say for himself- if he's a douche, he can be deleted.

I have provided the full interaction below (in blue), unedited for fairness, but with commentary (in Pink):

 Last message: 10-February-2012 9:34:37 PM

Happyhappy272 says:

Are you the type of girl to stay in at night cuddling on the couch watching a movie or are you the type that is a little crazy and takes life to the fullest? [hmm opening with a giant bucket of cheese eh? ok, I shall respond in a similar manner]

SasB says:

both and neither depending on the day

SasB says:

are you the type of guy who is in love with himself, hence takes topless photos of himself, or is trying to take the piss? [as really, its better to clear that up right away! If genuinely taking the piss you will a) laugh, if not, b) insert douchiness ASAP]

Happyhappy272 says:

im the type of guy that likes doing things for myself and is proud of what i have worked hard at [I'm guessing you mean your huge impressive muscles and physique here *please note saracasm]

Happyhappy272 says:

I dont love myself and i can take the piss out of myself [and yet you're about to demonstrate otherwise...]

posing like that is a joke among many i know [yep gottit- you're carrying on a bit here though and being defensive]

SasB says:

ok sure

its just never quite clear if ppl are joking or not

coz there are a lot who aren't!

they genuinely think "im like so totally awesome- check me out" [a normal gym junkie sentence, verbatim in my mind]

Happyhappy272 says:

yes well you can take it however you like i tend not to judge people

I do however judge people on their actions

SasB says:

yeah for sure

its the only truth

people can try and present whatever they like, but who they are will eventually show through in how they act and treat others

Happyhappy272 says:

this is true, you however I can tell already are a disgusting judgmental piece of shit I wouldn't even waste my time on, you look like shit, your personality is shit and you are just a shitful cunt, I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire your eyes are too far apart. Nose is definitely crooked. The shape of your face is not aesthetically pleasing at all. You look like a 3/10 with make up in this photo. I don't even want to imagine what you look like without make up. I actually just threw up in my mouth, just thinking about it. Your head is too big (although that may be, because of your giraffe neck posture) . As for your hair, lol. Seriously, do something. You look like a horse. Stare at your face for more than 5 seconds, and you will see how ugly you are. The eyes which are too far apart is what ruins /damages an already ugly face even further. Unfortunately for you, that can't be surgically fixed, lol. You arms are way too long. lol at how they hang by your sides. Kind of reminds me of lurch. Don't even let me start on your pale complexion. It only works if you look hot. Unfortunately, you do not look hot. Its hard to sum up a creature like you in one word. 'UGLY ' would be unfair , since it doesn't reflect how repulsive you look. GROTESQUE is stretching it. But somewhere in between, is where you would be, on the scale of an average man. I'm sorry if my words seem a little harsh. Just so you know, I sugar coated this post as much as possible.

Happyhappy272 has removed you from their contacts.

Now I'm not the world's most attractive person, and whether any of his attempt to upset me is accurate or not is a) a matter of opinion, b) coming from a man who takes photos (yes there was more than one, and they weren't all in funny poses) of himself topless, and c) irrelevant- as I had rejected HIM 3 times previously, so hey- hot or not buddy, you wanted it BAD!

So firstly I had a good laugh, then shared it with a few friends, reconsidered and thought- no this is GOLD- blog it.

The rant is brilliant- it's an extreme version of what I was talking about in my post on "Negs"- men who are that insecure with themselves that they feel the need to put women down to feel better about themselves and/or beat them into submission. That level of vile doesn't spew forth from someone in a few sentences- I'd say he was wanting to "punish" me for rejecting how incredibly awesome he was for so long.

Sure, I could have been "nicer" etc, but I think we quite effectively got to the point in an efficient amount of time. I only wish he hadn't deleted me so I could poke some more diatribe from him!

On the bright side- If anyone is bored, and want's to hack/ fuck with someone- I think we have a Happyhappy volunteer!